Many people think that phone sex is very harmless and people are having fun while being safe. What they don't know is that it involves explicit erotic matters and most of the people involve are young teens. Most of the time, people are talking about these erotic matters with strangers but others are doing this with someone they know. The main reason why many people are engaging in this kind of activity is because they think they are safe and being safe for them is not having sexually transmitted diseases. The sad thing here is that many companies are now offering the service because of the income that they receive.

If you come to think of it, phone sex is very harmful. It is correct that physically, people are safe because there are no chances that they will have sexually transmitted diseases. But psychologically and emotionally, people are affected with this activity especially that young teens are involved. Young teens are at the stage of exploring different things and if they are exposed to this kind of activity, they will have different view on sex. Phone sex teaches them to indulge instead of controlling the desire. Also, sex should be enjoyed during marriage. As for the married people who are involved, it promotes marital problems and adultery. Both for teens and adults, the activity promotes an increase in exploring more exciting adventure related to the field.

For those people who are still in the stage of dating and trying to preserve the joy of sex after marriage, they will surely fail if they are engaged in phone sex. Also, it would be a good feeling if you do it on your wedding night. Even if you talk to some teens who already engaged in having sex, they will tell you that in one way or another they regret doing it and realizing that they already lost that special thing in their life.

Another effect of phone sex is financial disability in the long run. There are companies that charge very high that people who are using and enjoying the service will not mind paying bucks. This is the reason why some people have high debts and this is a sad fact. Remember that it is very addictive that some people already don't think of other things in their life but to engage in the activity once in a while. So think twice if you're going to use the service.

People have long seemed to attempt new ways to explore and heighten their healthy sexual pleasures with their love partner. Generally, these natural curiosities had been limited to playful experimentation like varied positions, Tantric Sex (sexual yoga), and stimulating talk. Others have included increasingly risky sexual behaviors, such as unprotected sex with multiple partners, marital affairs, auto asphyxiation and illicit drug use.

Although hypnosis can often play a vital role in the treatment of a variety of therapeutic issues, ranging from impotence and premature ejaculation to marital discord and decreased libido, its recent misuse is creating new "safe sex" dangers. Although "Erotic Hypnosis" can be used as an adventurous exploration of one's human sexuality and pleasure, the use of hypnosis should be limited to those properly trained in its application. The proliferation of self-hypnosis programs, however, makes it impossible to fully regulate its private use.

The popularity of books and videos such as "The Sensuous Woman", "My Secret Garden", "Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know", and "Better Sex" proves that there is a growing market for information that celebrate healthy sex. Peter Masters' 2001 book, "Look Into My Eyes", is one of the first to celebrate the use of hypnosis to bring out the best in one's sex life!

Hypnosis is an often-misunderstood phenomenon that is basically an exercise in deep meditation. Once in a deeply relaxed state, one's mind develops a natural, heightened focus. It is this fixed concentration that affords one the unique ability to intensify pleasure, via the guided imagery of Erotic Hypnosis, like manipulating a dream, but more absorbing.

As with any sexual experience, trust between partners is vital. By the time one's relationship may develop into something more physically intimate, there is usually an assumption that enough time has evolved to develop positive trust between partners. Earlier within the relationship, however, one may find a sense of false security in phone sex. Although it can be a safer form of increasing intimacy, it is important to understand that if Erotic Hypnosis is practiced prematurely (especially over the phone), an unscrupulous partner could potentially take advantage of the other partner, without the victim even necessarily fully realizing it.

The potential danger arises from the fact that within this form of hypnosis, one leaves one's subconscious mind open to suggestions that one desires. Although it is generally true that people do not typically accept, or act upon, suggestions that are inconsistent with their desires, a cleaver hypnotist could offer pleasurable suggestions that may seem reasonable, yet are really more self-serving. The result could be comparable to someone who may have had one too many drinks, who later wondered why they behaved so foolishly the night before. With Erotic Hypnosis, for example, a post-hypnotic suggestion could conceivably be covertly offered that might compel the victim to take the relationship to "the next level," before they might have otherwise been ready for the advance.

Similar to any intimate encounter, it is invaluable that couples, who desire to experiment with this type of hypnosis, share a deep trust, honesty and mutual respect. Although it is not advisable to use any hypnosis outside of clinically indicated settings, respectful partners who care about each other will likely find this form to be a mutually surprising and stimulating encounter.

Erotic Hypnosis phone sex calls are my favourite calls. The experience ranges from a 5 minute quicky where the caller really is just fantasizing that he is hypnotized, going through the motions of being mind controlled, and getting off on the whole idea of it. At the other end of the spectrum are the recurring 45 minute sessions in which the caller submits to ever deepening hypnotic transes, divulges his inner desires, and responds to post hypnotic suggestion.

The most fascinating thing about hypnosis phone sex, is that for me, it is a wonderful tool for releasing hidden desires. Many callers will never admit what it is that they are hoping to experience. Manly guys do not want to say that they are interested in being feminized. Powerful business men find it difficult to ask to be dominated in any circumstance, especially sexually. Through hypnosis phone sex, however, these callers will ask to be hypnotized and taken control of. Often that is the only thing they say. "I want to be controlled by a beautiful woman." It is only after they are in a trance, and answering truthfully without the ego censuring their desires, they tell me what they really 'really' want.

It is a terrifying feeling to know that you want something that you consider 'abnormal' or 'freakish'. Men are conditioned into being straight manly men, powerful and strong. Not everyone can be that way all of the time, everyone has both strong and weak sides, masculine and feminine desires. Through hypnosis, the repressed desires can be brought to the front and enjoyed. Through hypnosis phone sex, the caller can remain anonymous and safe and enjoy the hypnotic session.

I have been asked to hypnotize callers into believing they are women, robots, inanimate objects, as well as into performing a variety of post hypnotic suggestions and responding to hidden triggers. For instance, one caller was taken with the desire to be 'programmed' into responding a certain way when he was in the presence of a certain beautiful woman. Another caller just wanted to be made to do embarrassing things so that he would know he was not acting under his own control.

Some callers are experimenting for the first time, others seem to call over and over with the exact same request, never tiring of the hypnotic sessions.

To get the most out of your erotic hypnosis phone sex session, I recommend the following preparations.

Set aside atleast half an hour of private time. 45 minutes is ideal, but half an hour is plenty of time to experience a hypnotic state.

Prepare a comfortable place to call from. Some people prefer a quiet bedroom, others a comfortable easy chair. It is important to remove possible distractions. You will need to be able to focus on the voice at the other end of the line.

Make sure you telephone batteries are fully charged. Losing the connection part way through is extremely disappointing.

Choose a phone sex hypnotist that you are comfortable with and call her. Let her know as best you can what you are hoping to experience.

Arrange for payment of the call, discuss that with the hypnotist so that there are no 'loose ends' regarding the price you will pay for tour session.

As an erotic phone sex hypnotist, I can say that not everyone who calls for a hypnosis session goes into a trance. Also, some people act like they are in a trance, likely roleplaying and fantasizing, but not at all hypnotized. Others focus, listen and do go into wonderful hypnotic trances, obeying commands and experiencing the erotic session. I cannot always tell over the phone if the caller is hypnotized or not, I can however, always tell if the caller is enjoying his experience, and probably that is all that they care about in the end.

One of the major benefits to the caller is that he can be 'commanded' to do something that he has secretly always wanted to do, but was afraid to try. With the responsibility of his actions falling on the hypnotist's shoulders, the caller is provided the freedom to experience his suppressed desires. It is very exciting to be able to temporarily at least, break free from stubborn inhibitions and go outside one's comfort zone.

I don't believe callers can be made to do anything they don't deep down want to do, although of course that is the allure of erotic hypnosis!

Phone sex is so appealing because of the mental images you can achieve simply by relaying to someone (or vice versa) what you want to do to them sexually. Many women don't feel comfortable talking dirty over a piece of electronic equipment. It makes them feel silly and holding a phone while you're trying to get your (and your partner's) rocks off, can be a bit challenging! So how can you become the phone sex queen that your lover desires you to be without sounding like a goofy amateur? A few tips and tricks will send you on your way to conquering the phone sex dilemma!

• Phone sex is about feeling sexual and expressing how you feel to your significant other so they can reciprocate the emotion. Sometimes all you need to start your imagination off on a phone sex adventure is a few key phrases. They can be as risqué and allusive as, "I'd love to put my lips all over your body tonight." Or they could be quick, simple, and directly to business like, "I'm so horny for you!" You may be the blushing virgin initially but before long you'll be the ultimate phone sex goddess! Use your imagination and drop your inhibitions at the door. Snuggle up in a dimly lit room with your lover on the telephone and remember, it's all about pleasure! So while your one hand is holding the phone, put that other hand to work stimulating your erogenous zones.

• You don't have to sound like a professional breathy porn star or a seductive actress in your phone sex conversations. Your partner doesn't expect you to be anyone other than yourself (unless you're role-playing, so don't worry about giggling every once in awhile or just using your normal bedroom voice. If you and your beau are both inexperienced when it comes to making the phone love, encourage each other with questions such as, "What would you like to do to me?" or "What would you do if I did this to you?" Get into it! There's a big difference between talking about something completely naughty and doing something not so naughty, like the laundry or the dishes, while you're trying to have phone sex. Close your eyes and really imagine all the things that are taking place in the conversation.

• Sometimes you may hit a snag in the conversation where you or your partner is at a loss for words. This is something that can be easily remedied with a trip down memory lane. Think of a time when you and your partner were realistically physically intimate together and recall those sexy moments over the phone. If you're dabbling in phone sex with someone you've never met in person and you hit an awkward silence, tell them about your fantasies. Replace the part of the lover with them and see where the conversation leads you. Perhaps they have the same fantasy so they can elaborate on how it would go. One more important thing is, let them hear your pleasure! Don't suppress the urge to moan softly.

Phone sex can be a fun and highly sensual way for you to spend some quality, intimate time with your lover from a long distance away. Creativity and imagination go into making this "sex act" possible! If you're afraid of broaching the issue with your significant other, talk dirty face-to-face and see how they react; if their response is one of desire (as it should be), then phone sex can be the next time towards a newfound, pleasurable experience between the two of you.

It doesn't matter if you're partner lives in the next city or in a country thousands of miles away, hlong distance relationship can work if you take the extra effort to keep each other connected.

Most long distance relationships don't work because both people haven't really plan out how they would continually stay in touch. Most couples don't choose to be in a relationship because they're in a situation where they are forced to go.

Try to think about your relationship as a long-term foreplay. In your phone conversations or email, tease your partner and make him/her fantasize on what you would do when you're together. When the conversation stops, he/she would daydream about you at work or in her/is dream. Another thing you can do is to play silly games that you would play back in school. For example, you can talk about your top five excuses for coming late for work or how to do animal noises.

A long distance relationship can be a positive experience for you. It makes you think of who you are missing and how valuable they are in your life. You will begin to appreciate more of your loved one.

The most important thing to when you're apart to enjoy your life and keep yourself busy. It's no use of waiting for the telephone to ring or checking your email every hour. There's a lot thing you can enjoy. Also, tell your partner to allow them to do the same thing. Phone conversation will become more interesting and enjoyable because you have more funny or unbelievable stories to tell your partner. All of this can help you become a better person which makes for better relationships.

What is sibling sexual abuse? Like all forms of sexual abuse, sibling sexual abuse is an abuse of power. If a more powerful or stronger sibling, bribes or threatens a weaker sibling to engage in sexual activity--albeit the aggressor might be younger--it is sexual abuse. It is abuse because it does not take into consideration the needs or wishes of the victim; rather, it meets the needs of the other person at the victim's expense.

"Incest is both sexual abuse and an abuse of power. It is violence that does not require force. Another is using the victim, treating them in a way that they do not want or in a way that is not appropriate by a person with whom a different relationship is required. It is abuse because it does not take into consideration the needs or wishes of the child; rather, it meets the needs of the other person at the child's expense. If the experience has sexual meaning for another person, in lieu of a nurturing purpose for the benefit of the child, it is abuse. If it is unwanted or inappropriate for her age or the relationship, it is abuse. Incest [sexual abuse] can occur through words, sounds, or even exposure of the child to sights or acts that are sexual but do not involve her. If she is forced to see what she does not want to see, for instance, by an exhibitionist, it is abuse. If a child is forced into an experience that is sexual in content or overtone that is abuse. As long as the child is induced into sexual activity with someone who is in a position of greater power, whether that power is derived through the perpetrator's age, size, status, or relationship, the act is abusive. A child who cannot refuse, or who believes she or he cannot refuse, is a child who has been violated." (E. Sue Blume, Secret Survivors).

The aggressor usually reinforces the sibling trust of the targeted victim, and then violates that trust in order to commit the abuse. The aggressor may use force, the threat of force, bribery, the offer of special attention, or a gift to make the victim keep the abuse secret.

In sibling sexual abuse, the victim and the abuser are siblings, half-siblings, step-siblings or siblings by adoption. As in other forms of sexual abuse, sibling sexual abuse does not involve sexual touching. The aggressor may force two or more children to engage in sexual activity with one another. The aggressor may force the siblings to watch sexual activity or pornographic videos. The aggressor may also abuse them repeatedly watching them dress, shower or using the toilet.

As in any sexual abuse by a family member sibling sexual abuse is harmful for the following reasons:

o The victim feels pressured and trapped by the abuser. This pressure includes bribes, sexual stimulation or physical force. Self-esteem is impacted immeasurably.

o The victim feels betrayed, because someone they expect to love and care for them is harming them in the worst way possible. In addition, because children inherently believe a parent will protect them from all harm, and when they are harmed by a sibling, the victim feels betrayed twice--once by his/her sibling and by their parents. They might even believe that the parents think the abuse is acceptable--further adding to the emotional harm.

o The victim may feel responsible, bad or dirty--thus engendering feelings of guilt, shame and humiliation about their body, sexuality and personhood.

o Sibling abuse causes more damage than abuse by a stranger. This is because children are dependent for years on their families and on parents to keep them safe. Studies of convicted teenage sexual abuse offenders show that the sibling offenders commit more serious abuse over a longer period of time than other teenage offenders. This is so because the victims--brothers or sisters--are readily available, they are available for longer periods and the aggressors are protected by the enforced secrecy.

If you know or suspect that one of your children is being sexually abused by a sibling, you need to make an intervention by contact a professional who specializes in sexual abuse prevention and recovery. If you allow the abuse and secrecy to continue, because you think, 'all children experiment sexually,' or 'it is just a phase, they will grow out of it,' you are no less responsible for the outcome of the sibling sexual abuse than the sibling aggressor. Thus, the damage is on-going rather than short lived. Furthermore, by making an intervention, you are clearly and emphatically stating the behavior is unacceptable and both children are given an opportunity to heal.

When your marriage ends feeling grief is a natural part of the loss of the family structure and the significant relationship, whether the decision was mutual, or thrust upon you--both parties suffer.

Grief has various stages and the intense emotions that occur can make it difficult to make the many decisions that are required.

In my role as a Life Coach, I rely on both my professional knowledge and personal experience--proffering different options and alternatives for the resolution of issues-- to help couples communicate and negotiate effectively--financial, emotional, dividing tangible possessions and co-parenting.

However, we know that emotions can impair the ability to make informed decisions. This is the reason that I also help divorcing people understand and manage the grief process. Grief is relevant in divorce because everyone is vulnerable to it during and after experiencing a major loss.

Many enter the divorce settlement negotiation in the early stages of grief and vacillate between denial and feelings of sadness, anger and wanting to retaliate. Others readily enter into the acceptance stage; they have made peace with the loss of their marriage and are ready to build a new life--therefore sadness, grief, anger and retaliation are absent. Others systematically diminish the uncomfortable feelings attendant to grief through using alcohol, drugs, work, sex and other self-medication. Some diminish the uncomfortable feelings with sleeping pills and/or antidepressants.

Children are impacted by their own grief and by their parents' grief, especially when parents struggle to make informed decisions regarding their children due to theirs and their children's grief--thus everyone experiences a double dose.

As a relationship coach--or in this case a relationship dissolution coach, I help couples understand and manage their sadness, anger and grief so as to lessen its effects on informed decision-making. For example: "I can see how angry you are and in my experience that is very common and normal." This acknowledgement diminishes the intense feelings and enhances their informed decision making.

For those who are recurrently angry, sad and/or seeking retaliation, I continually empathically acknowledge and normalize their grief, anger, sadness or desire to seek retaliation. For those who are self-medicating or visibly stuck in depression, I encourage additional support--such as accountants, financial planners, lawyers and real estate professionals.

No matter their stage of grief most divorcing people are likely to progress toward acceptance when their grief, sadness, anger and retaliation feelings are recognized and acknowledged.

Most divorcing people are also likely to benefit from the increased trust they feel when I empathically recognize their grief, anger, sadness and desire for retaliation.

Children also benefit from recognition of their feelings and this helps parents advance towards acceptance. As parents move past the early and frequently volatile stages of grief, anger and sadness, and make decisions in the best interest of their children, then the children progress more readily through their grief, sadness and anger.

An Anthem, AZ man was arrested after a mother called the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office stating a man, who was looking for a baby-sitter, had come on to her 12-year-old daughter.

Michael Whitlow, 26, was arrested on charges of kidnapping and luring a minor for sexual exploitation. He also faces a variety of drug charges.

According to Sheriff's Office spokesman Capt. Paul Chagolla, after the girl's stepfather dropped her off, Whitlow took the girl inside and locked the doors. The girl later said she felt trapped and frightened. She said Whitlow told her he could hardly keep his hands off her. He allowed her to leave without assaulting her, the Sheriff's Office said. Chagolla said Whitlow has admitted wanting to engage her as a sexual partner.

The 12-year old girl's stepfather made a fatal mistake when he dropped his 12-year old step daughter off at Whitlow's home. It is astonishing that an adult would drop a child off at an unknown person's home for any reason. Although, Whitlow did not physically/sexually assault her, the emotional damage as a result of her feeling trapped and frightened is unknown and might not be known for several years. His statement, "...hardly keep my hands off you, you are very attractive; do not tell your parents..." is abuse. In addition, she feared for her life that is abuse.

Although, many adults would not consider this incident sexual abuse, the fact Whitlow made sexual statements toward her fits the criteria for sexual abuse. "If the experience has sexual meaning for another person, in lieu of a nurturing purpose for the benefit of the child, it is abuse. If it is unwanted or inappropriate for her age or the relationship, it is abuse. Incest [sexual abuse] can occur through words, sounds, or even exposure of the child to sights or acts that are sexual but do not involve her. If she is forced to see what she does not want to see, for instance, by an exhibitionist, it is abuse. If a child is forced into an experience that is sexual in content or overtone that is abuse. As long as the child is induced into sexual activity with someone who is in a position of greater power, whether that power is derived through the perpetrator's age, size, status, or relationship, the act is abusive. A child who cannot refuse, or who believes she or he cannot refuse, is a child who has been violated." -E. Sue Blume, Secret Survivors

Myth: If a child is sexually touching a sibling, peer or cousin, it is not sexual abuse.

Many parents/people believe most sexual activity with a sibling, peer or cousin is merely curiosity and not harmful.

A four-year old, whether a boy or girl, who touches a baby brother's penis, while anyone is changing his diaper is showing normal curiosity. However, it is imperative for the adult to gently explain to the sibling that the baby's penis is private and no one is allowed to touch anyone's private parts. You can explain that you need to clean the baby's penis with baby wipes or a wash cloth, which is different than touching it for another reason.

Fact: When a child is a target of sexual activity it is abuse because the child, who is the target, whether a younger or older sibling, cousin or peer experiences abuse, because the targeted child is induced (duped, coerced or tricked) into sexual activity with someone who is in a position of greater power, whether that power is derived through age, size status, or relationship. A child who cannot refuse, or who believes she/he cannot refuse, is a child, who has been sexually violated.

If you suspect or know there is sexual activity being acted on; you need to ask yourself:

Is this a brief display of curiosity? If it is not a brief display of curiosity, it is sexual abuse If you determine it is a brief display of curiosity--explain to both children about appropriate touch and boundaries.

If either child is displaying any of the following characteristics, you need to seek professional help:

Preschool Children:

o Rubbing genital area frequently with seeming intent versus casually touching the genital area.

o Asks questions about sex frequently--even after the question has been answered.

o Shows significant curiosity to watch other family members dressing, undressing, using the commode, or showering.

o Coerces a sibling, peer or cousin to play doctor.

o Pretends to have intercourse by lying on top of a sibling.

o Have a sudden fear of specific things, people, place (bathroom or the room where the abuse took place), etc.

o Act out inappropriate sexual activity or display unusual interest in sexual matters.

o Have temper tantrums, especially coinciding with interactions with visits to places or interaction with a sibling, peer or cousin.

o Display violent behavior such as: kicking, hitting, biting--survivors feel extreme frustration and anger.

o Have mood swings, hitting, withdrawal (abused children often feel alone and helpless and withdraw into a shell), culminating into depression.

o Bed wetting or soiling.

o Experience nightmares--monsters, being chased or bogey men), fear of going to bed or sleepwalking.

o Display physical symptoms of sexual abuse such as genital pain, itching, vaginal bleeding (bloodstains in panties or pajamas), discharge, redness in genital area, or bladder or kidney infections.

o Display unexplained aggressiveness or rebellion.

o Insert objects into genitals/rectum--act out sexual behavior on doll, toys or pets.

Elementary School-Age Children:

Elementary school-age children will display all of the above and:

o Complain about aches and pains, headaches and other psychosomatic ailments.

o Have unusual knowledge and interest in sex beyond developmental level.

o Display adult or sexualized behavior, (walking seductively, adult type flirting, acting and talking like an adult)

o A drop in grades

o Difficulty concentrating--Doctors might diagnoses ADHD or ADD

Teenagers:

Teenagers will display all the above and:

o Depression.

o Inability to trust others.

o Act out self-destructive behaviors: alcohol and/or drug use, eating disorders.

o Bathe excessively

o Become excessively secretive

o Develop strategies for protection such as: layering clothes, wearing baggy or safety-pinning clothes or sleeping on the floor or in the closet, under the bed or blocking their door.

o Body piercing--navel, nose, lip, tongue, numerous ear piercing, tattoos.

o Act out pseudo maturity.

o Acquire sexually transmitted diseases.

o Dramatic increase in the frequency of masturbation or masturbation to the point of injury

o Act out promiscuously.

o Experience serious confusion regarding sexual identity.

o An aversion toward opposite sex.

o Sexual interest in children.

Because children often believe the sex offenders threats or feel shame and guilt, they fail to report episodes of sexual abuse. Parents need to be vigilant for signs and symptoms. Do not accept simple, reasonable explanations on these issues. These signs suggest there is something troubling your child, even if it is not sexual abuse. In any case, you need to determine the causes of the behavioral change. Any change in behavior that does not fit normal stages of development is cause for concern and needs to be investigated and resolved.

A phone sex guide? Why do you need a phone sex guide? Don't you just get on the phone and talk dirty? Doesn't it all kinda come naturally? Isn't phone sex kinda cheesy like in the movies? No, not really. Great phone sex can be a lot of fun when you keep some basics in mind, do it with right person and ignore just about every portrayal of phone sex in the movies you've ever seen. Except maybe the scene in The Truth About Cats and Dogs. It also doesn't come naturally for most people, but its a great way to keep a long distance relationship alive or explore a fantasy you've always thought about in a safe, non-judgemental environment.

I do know how to do great phone sex. I do it for a living and love it. I love roleplaying and indulging men's fantasies on the phone. I like to think that I give intelligent phone sex. There's a lot more conversation involved than just moaning and groaning on my end. Of course, I can do that too. But if you want really great, mind-blowing, fun, cum-back-for more erotic phone sex then you have to help. I may be a Goddess, but I can't read minds over the phone!

Here are some of my tips for a great call.

Get Comfy. You're going to be doing some body touching as well as talking so wear something with um "easy access".

Privacy. Unless getting caught in the act is your thing, make sure you are not going to be disturbed. Lock the door, close the windows, indulge when your roommates are out of the house, etc.

Prior Planning. Yup, kinda breaks the spontaneity but if you're calling a professional service, like me, make sure you have enough money in your account before you call. Its a real bummer when you are just about to explode in the orgasm of your life and the operator cuts in to tell you your time is up or you need to add more money.

Talk to Me. Tell me what you want. You don't have to have the whole call scripted out in your mind, but give me an idea of what you're looking for. I love to roleplay but I need to know who you want to play with! Give me an idea of what you're looking for. Do you have a fantasy you've always wanted to play out? Are you looking for a hot and sweaty up-against-the wall quickie?

Make A Date. No matter if you're planning an encounter with your long-distance lover or setting up a session with me you'll have better luck in getting what you want by making a date. I take requests for dates all the time, it makes for a more relaxed time when I know who, when, what and where so I can really blow your mind!

I'm not going to tell you how to talk dirty as that varies from person to person. What turns me on, could turn you cold. This phone sex guide is more to give you some ideas on the practical side so we can have some great phone sex together.

There are two camps when it comes to sex addiction: those who believe it is a real affliction; and those who don't.

I'm in the "don't" camp. Sexual addiction is, in my opinion, an easy and convenient label for a very complicated problem. As it stands, there is a lack of empirical evidence and scientific agreement on whether such a condition exists.

You see, the trick to what makes up a sex addiction is defining what are 'normal' sexual pursuits. An exercise in subjectivity as every person has their own comfort level and preference: some people want sex three times a day (or more); some have exotic tastes; others favor vanilla sex.

Consequently, it's extremely difficult to do any scientific study that can set guidelines to say what is an acceptable way to express sexuality.

That said, when you look at what sex addiction advocates have developed over the last 15 years, their standards are a moral judgment--rather than scientific conclusion--based around a heterosexual, monogamous, long term sex lifestyle. Other forms of sexual expression outside these boundaries could be construed as a sex addiction.

Apparently a lot of people agree with this belief system as over the last few years we see the term sex addiction popping up all over the media. In fact, Oprah and Dr. Phil have christened it as a real condition. Dr. Drew Pinsky has an incredibly popular television show helping "B" list celebrities.

Not surprisingly, all this media attention has filtered down to the average couple. I get countless inquiries from people asking how to help their 'sex addicted' partner. When they explain their situation, it's usually a gross self-misdiagnosis: "He wants sex everyday. I think he's an addict."

Please understand, it can be incredibly harmful to a couple's wellbeing when an incorrect diagnosis is put on their sexual dilemma(s). When you self diagnosis, it's difficult to impartially gage if the behavior is obsessive and harmful to you and your partner; or (more likely) you're uncomfortable with the behavior and don't know how to manage the circumstance.

However, all my nitpicking does not help an individual or couple who is in the middle of a serious sexual struggle.

After eight years together, one couple revealed their marriage started to unravel quickly. The husband was having an affair, compulsively self pleasuring as well as seeking out sex workers.

His wife decided to work on saving their marriage. She first started to read books and research the web. After trying a combined eight different counselors, they both felt they were getting nowhere fast.

It was only when she stumbled upon the term sex addiction, she says everything clicked into place and their situation made sense. Author, Patrick Carnes, defines sexual addiction as, "any sexually-related, compulsive behavior which interferes with normal living and causes severe stress on family, friends, loved ones and one's work environment."

After they took Carne's on-line test, it showed the husband was a sex addict. He started to attend Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) and she S-Anon meetings. Both of them agree that SAA and S-Anon has been instrumental in fixing and changing the way they are as a couple, parents and individuals.

He confides, "It is the only place where I can be 100% completely open. I feel like I belong." They are grateful both groups have taken away the shame and stigma of what was happening in his sex and their overall life.

In this situation, the husband caused "severe stress on family, friends, loved ones and one's work environment", as well as possibly giving STIs to his partner. Obviously, it's a good thing when someone can get immediate and free help if they feel their sexual behavior is out of control.

Yet, it's been my experience this is the rare exception and not the norm. For the record here are a few things that are normal sexual behaviors.

• If a person has a high sex drive and wants sex far more than their partner

• If a person wants to experiment in outside the heterosexual, monogamous boundaries and try such things as S&M, swinging or cyber sex

• If a person wants to look at porn in moderation

If you are in the middle one of these typical couple difficulties, it's best worked through with a professional counselor.

If you feel strongly that you are dealing with a sex addiction, remember the road to recovery is not a quick fix, cease and desist the behavior immediately. It's a lengthy, soul searching process where both partners must be 100% committed to fixing themselves and their relationship.

So the next time you read that someone in the news has a sex addiction, please take it with a grain of salt. Most likely they don't. But it does make for very sexy-headline selling-news.

No one wants to freely admit that their sex life is really dead. Sex is an important part of really living your life to the fullest and if you are feeling like you are in a drought of sorts, it can be tough to even admit it to yourself. It's something that you have to do though, if you want to be able to bring the drought to an end and get yourself back into the swing of having sex. How do you really know when your sex life is dead?

Here are some signs that should prove that you need to find a way to spring it back to life:

1. You know more than a couple of porn stars by name and you know all about them.

It's normal to know a couple of porn stars by name, but if you can roll of ten or more names of adult film stars, chances are it is because you have been doing more than your fair share of watching videos by yourself. And if you know all about them, their likes and their dislikes, well... that pretty much seals the deal and proves that you probably could use a jump start to recharge your sexual batteries.

2. You get aroused just hearing the word sex, much less thinking about it.

When you are deprived of being able to relieve yourself sexually, then it tends to become something that you think about a lot. And it also tends to manifest itself in the funniest of ways, like getting turned on just by hearing the word sex, or by something as simple as a light breeze. If you find that you have been thinking about sex an awful lot and you have no real way of release, then you can bet that your sex life is dead. And no, it does not really count if your release comes when you are all alone.

3. You take a look at the expiration dates on your condoms and you realize that they are all expired.

Just about every guy has that drawer where the condoms get stashed away, and if fumbling through them you realize that they are all out of date, then you know that it's been more than just a little while since you have gotten laid. When you see that you are getting past the expiration dates on all of your condoms, you should get the hint that something has got to give and you better find a way to enhance and wake up your sex life.

It is only in recent years that the addiction to pornography has received the serious treatment it deserves. This is a condition that can carry some significant consequences and rip families apart. Any addiction begins by becoming a habit. The same is true of pornography.

Is it Addiction or Good, Not so Clean Fun?

The big question you must ask when it comes to identifying porn addictions is whether or not you are viewing sexually explicit material for entertainment or if you feel a need to do so. There is a fine line between casual viewing and abuse. When you can't seem to take your mind off the images, can't wait for another opportunity to view porn, or are beginning to hide this behavior from your spouse or partner you may very well be crossing the lines of fun and addiction.

Can You Walk Away?

The big question to ask yourself is this: can you walk away and resume your normal sex life with your partner without ever viewing porn again? Those who are truly suffering from an addiction to pornography often have difficulty carrying on normal sexual relationships without first viewing pornography or at the very least visualizing the pornographic material they have recently viewed. Can you put it down for good and resume your life without needing that stimulation? If the answer is no, it is a good idea to seek treatment for your addiction to pornography.

How Can NLP and Hypnotherapy Help?

Viewing porn is a mental thing for most people. It provides a mental high or good feeling. It isn't a physical high unless other stimulation is performed in association with the pornographic viewing. Hypnotherapy and Neuro-Linguistic Programming both rely on the power of the subconscious to bring about deliberate and conscious changes in behavior. If you are reading this chances are that you recognize behavior you aren't pleased with in your life and are trying to find a way to change these behavior patterns.

The hope is that you are making changes before things have gotten out of hand. If so, you will be glad to know that NLP and hypnotherapy combined can bring about rapid results for the treatment of an addiction to pornography. In as few as three treatments you can find yourself free of the bonds that addiction to porn leaves behind. You will find no better pornography addictions treatments available for the price and can enjoy total anonymity that is lacking in almost any other treatment setting.

If you are struggling with an addiction to pornography, you owe it to yourself, your family, and your partner to seek the help you need to overcome this painful addiction today. There is no way of undoing the potential damage that can come about as a result of this addiction. Seeking treatment is the first step to full recovery and releasing the power of the mind for this purpose can bring quick results and a rapid path to curing your addiction to pornography today.

Is your spouse a porn addict? Do you find pornography to be the "other woman" in your relationship? Discover the Pros and Cons of Pornography and how you can help heal the addiction of your spouse!

[Q] My husband enjoys looking at pornography. I am vehemently against it. We fight about this all the time. What should I do?

[A] Pornography is a fact of life. Women have a tough time with pornography for many reasons that include insecurity, jealousy, inferiority, self-esteem and worth. If your husband enjoys pornography, take a deeper look at understanding his need for pornography, spend some time with him understanding his need first before nay saying it. When you seek to understand it, then it draws you closer to him. Fighting or telling him no, drives you both apart and makes you both less attracted to each other.

Believe it or not there is a healthy and unhealthy relationship to pornography. Think of your favorite actor of the opposite sex. When watching an intimate scene with this actor and another actor, how do you feel? This is a form of pornography, it just exists in your mind.

A healthy relationship is one that enhances or supplements our life and relationships. An unhealthy relationship is one that is obsessive and is an addiction.

So, talk to your husband and seek to understand rather than reject. Understand with empathy before rejecting.

Take a look at your life, anytime you were told not to do something or someone vehemently opposed something you were doing...did it stop you? Human Behavior is to defend our position and to continue to do something when told it is wrong or when told that it is not agreed or acceptable...all you have to do is watch the news today to see evidence of this fact. So, if you resist it, you are pushing your husband to do it more. If you accept it, then you will see that it will happen less and less over time. Participate in it, support it, and understand it...collaborate on the need for porn and work together to see if it is a healthy or unhealthy issue not from your judgment of it, but simply from dialogue and understanding.

Folks, the only reason that porn is viewed in private is because it is considered taboo in our society and spouses/partners take it personally or offensive. And this breeds anger, resentment, and drives the porn watcher to do it even more - this is where it has the potential to be unhealthy. It is a fact of life, it is out there, resisting it attracts it more, accepting it lovingly assists in healthy balance and relationships.

If this is a reason that marriages are broken or end, there is more going on than porn, porn is simply the one massive symptom that ended the relationship. Let's get real!

Contrary to what is common belief, too much porn effects our real love lives in a very big way. While it does give a certain sexual high temporarily, it can at best be described as setting the mood. However, when it comes to performance, it is quite another story. Problems With Too Much Porn

The most obvious problem with too much porn is the fact that it leads to too much self satisfaction or masturbation. This in turn gives rise to a depletion in your libido and a lack of majo- frequent masturbation gives a temporary fillip.

It leads to a definite lack of sexual desire with your partner because too much porn gives a desire to 'get on' with it without dwelling much on romance and foreplay which leaves the partner dissatisfied and with a feeling of a certain lack of connection that is so important for mutual satisfaction.

Too much porn also leads to longer refractory periods i.e. the interval between the erections. It also causes a rise in the latency period (the time taken to achieve ejaculation).

Too much porn is addictive. One often finds those used to too much porn getting restless if they do not get their regular fix

If you are indulging in too much porn, it is definitely time top sit back and reflect because besides all the problems outlined above, it would lead to a medical condition termed as "idiosyncratic masturbatory style".

What is Idiosyncratic Masturbatory Style? During masturbation the level of pressure as well as friction that a man applies is artificial and is very much higher than what it would be in the "real". This leads to him getting used to it and not getting it in real, leaves him dissatisfied as he does not get the satisfaction during a regular intercourse. Often men tend to reach a point of no return as far as their masturbation habits are concerned, winch definitely has an impact on the real life sexual encounters. One often notices that such men crave more for oral sex as well as masturbation even from their partners! Considering all these facts, you need to cut down upon too much porn in case you feel that it is interfering with your natural instincts and you have the desire to enjoy a full, more natural and more satisfying sex life with your partner. Consulting your partner would be a great idea to know if there is any major change in your style and performance arising from too much porn.

When you think about it, pornographic movies are a little ridiculous. The men are impossibly proportioned, the sex is entirely for the man's benefit, and the man shows all the intimacy and emotional range of a sponge. In short, it is sex perfectly tailored to men! No surprises then that when we try it with our partners, the usual responses is negative... really negative.

While that might seem the end of it, most of us know (Either from personal experience or from watching the recent proliferation of sex tapes on the internet) that some people are having sex that would make any adult movie star proud. The question is: what are they doing that most guys aren't?

Women and Porn-star Sex

Most women are willing to experiment with some elements of porn-star sex, they just don't like the other elements. Unsurprisingly, women find a total lack of intimacy a huge turn-off: after all it could be anyone underneath your favorite star and he'd have sex exactly the same way! There is a key message for men everywhere: don't ever think that your hips moving like a jackrabbit can ever replace basic intimacy!

Often in these movies, the guys act in a very dominant way. While this may seem like a bad thing to try in your sex life, in fact this is often something that guys forget: just make sure not to confuse being manly with being mean! It is okay to act dominant and in-control during sex, for many women it is a key part of the sex fantasy.

In porn everything is done for the man's benefit, which is one of many reasons why women don't usually like watching it. If you want to try these kind of acts in real life, they need to be about both of your pleasures. The cowgirl, for example, is mostly used to get some 'good' shots in movies, whereas in real life it is an excellent way to give her a G-spot orgasm. However not all sex acts that take place in porn are about her pleasure, so the question is how do things that seem entirely about the guy's pleasure become something that she will want to do.

For Whose Pleasure?

That is where making sure that you have great sex is really important. Sex should always be able getting to the goal where you get pleasure from touching her and she gets pleasure from touching you. A good example of this is anal sex. A lot of guys just 'stick it in' hurting her (And possibly themselves!) in the act, however if done correctly so that you make sure that it is pleasurable to her throughout, anal sex should stimulate the erogenous zones in a different way to 'regular sex'.

While there are better ways to learn than watching these kinds of movies, there are lessons to be learned. You should never consider going out of your way to repeat the sexual acrobatics of your favorite star, but there is nothing wrong with using some techniques in the right way.

We often get asked this question when working with couples as well as individuals. Pornography, now more commonly known as "porn", has been around in various forms for thousands of years dating back to cave dweller paintings and well-endowed clay fertility statues.

On the positive side, we have found that pornography and erotica can enhance a couple's sex life by getting them in the mood. In these all too busy stressful hectic times, couples often find themselves lacking the motivation to be intimate with one another and watching a few minutes of porn can set the ball in motion. Watching porn can revitalize things up when "sexy-time" starts to become routine. Couples often figure out what their partner enjoys and fall into predictable patterns. There is nothing like the excitement of not knowing what is going to happen next to spice things up. Viewing pornography can also give partners new ideas or permission to play out various fantasies. For those on the more inhibited side when it comes to discussing sex, it may be a way to teach you and your partner how to be a better lover or explore uncharted territories you find exciting. Sexsmartfilms.com, offers a wide variety of educational films on sex and intimacy. Additionally, for those with a more adventurous side Tristan Taormina's web site, Pucker.com, also offers educational/instructional videos.

The downside of pornography is that with the emergence of the internet the face of pornography has drastically changed and continues to change at a rapid pace. What was just a few years ago considered "hardcore porn" is now labeled as "soft-core porn." As pornography has gotten more and more hardcore it has little resemblance to what was once considered erotica. Porn increasingly intermingle angry, misogynistic, demeaning, and forced sex themes. This past year, New Sensations released a new line of pornography called "The Romance Series" which focuses on stories of sensuality, passion, romance, commitment and connection. The series is their best seller and one of the adult movies won the Feminist Porn Award this past year - "Yes, they have annual awards." Other pornographic producers are following suit bringing the relationship and intimacy back to pornography.

One of the negative aspects of porn is that it often depicts unrealistic images of both men and women. The women are predominantly young, in great shape, and have often undergone plastic surgery. Women are also portrayed unrealistically in that they appear to be instantaneously aroused, orgasm quickly, easily and without any stimulation other than penetration. The men are well-endowed and have long-lasting erections. The end result may be that you, your partner or both of you may have unrealistic expectations about how you should look and perform sexually.

For some, another negative side effect is the possibility of addiction to pornography. Dopamine is often called the "reward" or "pleasure-giving" neurotransmitter and it is released when you are sexually excited. Additionally, endorphins are released when you orgasm giving you feelings of a peaceful, euphoric bliss. Over time neurons that fire together wire together creating neural maps in our brain that can link pornography, excitement and euphoric bliss together. This is the same area of your brain associated with other addictive behaviors. Additionally, for some viewers as the novelty wears off they become desensitized seeking higher and higher levels of stimulation for satisfaction which can lead to more graphic, aggressive, or fetishistic styles of sex as well as hours alone on the internet searching for that perfect combination.

Our word to the wise, proceed with caution. Know yourself, know your partner. If either one of you is prone to addictive behaviors or find yourself becoming more dependent on pornography as part of your sexual repertoire, you may want to ask yourself is it a prerequisite, a main course, or an occasional appetizer to spice things up?

Counter Attraction was founded by Lynn Valverde, MFT, and Leslie Davis, PsyD, in Los Angeles, California. Counter Attraction offers workshops and relationship counseling for couples. The goal of Counter Attraction is to help couples resolve relationship issues and re-kindle passion by teaching couples the skills they need to recognize where Counter Attraction exists in their relationship, how to attune to their partner through Couples Communication in ordered to come together and work through these difficult areas thereby promoting secure, resilient and successful relationships between partners. Our mission includes the ongoing expansion and refinement of the Counter Attraction model through implementation of the latest research in attachment, neuroscience, early trauma, and mindfulness.

When Love and Attraction turn to Counter Attraction. How is it that the traits we once loved, now infuriate us? How did we go from inseparable to incompatible? Counter Attraction is the driving force behind relationship conflict. Learn how to Re-connect and Re-kindle that lost Loving feeling. The Law of Counter Attraction asserts that the same ego-driven survival instincts in our brain that eventually doom 80% of all relationships to failure can actually be re-directed to create a more loving, lasting and fulfilling relationship than ever imagined, and offer unique opportunities to heal childhood wounds and insecurities.

It is no secret, like just about every other guy in the world, ever since I was old enough, sex has consumed my mind. At the time I wasn't old enough to understand the difference between good sex, OK sex, bad sex, Great Sex... Sex was sex. And then sex was primarily internet porn, which at the time wasn't nearly as developed as it is now. This was back in the dial up days, where I was "surfing the web" with either an AOL, Compuserve, or Prodigy free trial. I guess at that time, the modems weren't fast enough to even watch videos like you can today. A picture said a thousand words. The only videos were on tapes which some friend would have found in his parents secret hiding spot in the closet. VHS Tapes, not DVDs...

I guess at that time, I assumed all sex was Great porn star sex. With the size and stamina of the porn star guys, and that all girls would take it like porn star girls. After all, porn was basically my handbook, a guide that showed me up close and personal the birds and bees (an analogy I still don't get). Tips on how to give her great sex.

But that was then and this is now. I am no longer a virgin, and I do understand the difference between the varying levels of sex, from bad to GREAT!! And reality set in as far as my sexual performance compared to porn star sex. But in the beginning, even bad sex was sex, so it was great. How to give her great sex wasn't as important. I wasn't even that interested on tips for sex. Not until later did I really learn the difference, and now that I am older, actually care about having great romps in the sack as opposed to a mediocre sprint.

My goals have changed, and I realized how much better Great Sex is compared to bad sex, or even OK sex. And don't get me wrong, OK sex isn't bad, and probably has the highest frequency, but still, when the time is there and the kids (the forget me nots from a hopefully great spin through the sheets because to have kids for a 2 minute quickie is a shame) are away at grandmom's; that is the time for GREAT sex. A night out with wifey, a nice dinner, a couple drinks, a few games of pool, a little dancing, and cap it off with a there is nobody to wake up, I am going to make you scream for your life, position after position, I wish I had this on video moment of glory that if it were anything else you would tell the kids about when they got older.

Well, I also found out the hard way that that wasn't as easy as it sounds either. Even when the kids are away, and you can do what ever you want, it doesn't always work out as planned. You're tired from a long day at work, getting older your sex drive isn't as keen as it once was, and not having sex every day (sometimes multiple times a day) like in the honeymoon years your stamina may have waned a bit from what it once was.

I have been there, done that. But I have also stumbled upon one more secret women have been keeping from us; Male Kegel Exercises. Yes, men can do them too. Just like keeping your other muscles in shape, you can keep your sex muscles (PC muscles), in shape through kegel exercises. You can do them like how women do, by clenching the muscles in your Taint (it ain't your balls, it ain't your ass), holding and releasing. Or I have also found a set that lets you do kegels like a man should, with weights.

But whatever way you decide to do the exercises, take this secret and run with it. Do it for your pre-teen self who was "surfing the web" with dreams of great porn star sex. Do it for the pornstar handbook you used as your tip giving guide. Do it for yourself, here and now. You spend your life living your for your family, take this one and do it for you. And I am sure your wife will be more than happy to get her heart racing and her juices flowing. Because that another secret. Women love sex too, but not the 1 minute in and out preceding my nap sex. Great I'm gonna make you cum twice sex (but that's an article for another time). It's a win win situation. Enjoy!!

Ever asked yourself why some men cant get satisfaction from their wives, and just have to go out to ask for more? Truth is home sex most times is bad sex, every body likes pleasure, so if all he's asking for is pleasure why not give him? Can I ask you a simple question? How's sex life like in your marriage? For most people it's as easy as instant noodles, two minutes and pssh its over. Sex in marriage should be "Love making" it should be taken slowly, involve a lot of suspense and very pleasurable. And if what you want to achieve is 'sex like a porn star' then you just have to check out the porn star, what makes porn stars tick? What are their secrets?

1. How do you look?

Image is everything, your look as a woman is an important turn on for your spouse, dress seductively for that night, a friend once confided in me that, her husband saw her looking sexy, putting on skimpy things and they headed straight to the bed room.

Men just can't stand seduction, so make sure you dress like a porn star a and make up like a porn star it's the first part of achieving sex like a porn star.

2. Passion: its also very important that you put a lot of passion into love making, a lot of housewives see it as a regular routine, its normal he comes on me, and then its over. Let your passion for it be seen:

The way you move your body.

The way you moan.

The way you touch him.

The way you look at him.

The way you respond to him.

3. Talk: Sex is a conversation between lovers, however you are to talk with every single part of your body.

Just as moaning and your body rhythm tells your spouse he's communicating, total silence distracts him, it makes him feel he's not getting it right. Talk with your body and speak if you want to be touched in a particular place.

4. Oral sex: we all have our different views on oral sex, but if you ask men most men want a blow job. It doesn't make sense for you to frown at oral sex, if someone else is giving him outside. If you ask me I'll do any thing to save my home even a blowjob.

5. Learn on the job. While men want to get married to good girls, they want the bad girls to satisfy their libido, most times they live in both worlds, if you ask me good girls don't get married: so long as you are married you're having sex so enjoy it well, do all you can to learn all the tricks bad girls use to hook your husband out there so that he can eat his cake and have it. all the best!

For some men, they wished they knew the secrets, while some are to preoccupied with themselves to bother about getting their lady to respond.

There are secrets that make a woman to readily respond to sex and enjoy it. If you can make a woman to enjoy sex, she will give you a good time too in return. And you can bet that she will not readily let go of you.

She would want to stay with you in the relationship and do all she can to protect you.There are some sensitive parts of a woman that you should pay attention to in order to enjoy her.

Her breasts are one of her most sensitive parts. If you want to get your girl aroused for sex and ready for you instantly, that's the part of her to touch.

Women love it when you touch them there. It stimulates them a lot and gets them in the real mood. Stroke it lovingly over and over, and you will see how she responds to you.

Then, go a bit further and use your mouth on her breast. Pay particular attention to the tip of her breast (her nipple area). That's the part that gets her the most excited and aroused. Your woman will respond to your loving, gently caresses on her is in such a way that makes her ready for the final act of sex.

By stimulating her this way, you are showing that you really love her and want her to enjoy the act.

How would you like to be the person who always has a great time in bed? The people you admire for their great sex life have secret methods and products that they use to their great advantage. You can also get the same secrets here [http://www.MoreThanMySalary.com] and use them to enjoy yourself everyday.

Love-making often goes along with falling in love; having sex over historical periods of time has had countless forms. Many of the initial sorts of what may very well be regarded as porn material were came upon in the medieval ruins of Pompeii. Everyone that's alive possesses some kind of interest in real human reproduction, and also not surprisingly it comes with an entertainment component into it that has skyrocketed it right into an industry that brings in millions of dollars every year. The adult entertainment market is equipped with a wide array of lovemaking experiences that virtually anyone can easily uncover more rather than in person.

Adult entertainment takes place throughout a range of various media channels. The World Wide Web, simply because of its world-wide access, made adult entertainment far more readily accessible. You can find porn portals available online that assemble various sub-genre of film and video porn in a single spot. Quite short videos combined with full-length films are on the regular basis provided.

Several websites provide free porn information and facts in order to get people to turn into paid members of the page.

Some of the folks who have started life as celebrities of porn videos have gone on to booming business professions affiliated with this niche. Jenna Jameson is such woman, an authentic free porn starlet. Began taking pictures, and ultimately she began getting work done in sexual videos. Jane is a great award-winning entertainer from leading adult community agencies. She has furthermore been the host of a show on TV on Playboy Television. Jenna managed countless 100 % free porn web sites, and eventually branched out into producing her very own adult films and promoting goods, and also endorsing its very own WiFi firm.

The adult entertainment array has a wide reach as we all can clearly notice, and also it features a specific thing enjoyable for everybody's likes, even thought the free porn marketplace is a truly questionable one.

As being a passionate of the erotic nature of men and ladies, I would like to present my ideas about the free porn sector we all tend to use the most even though sometimes we do not know it.

• Reuse and Repurpose: If you already created some popular content, see where you can expand it or possibly target a certain aspect of it in finer detail.

• FAQ: Ask your followers and clients what their top questions are at several stages of working with you. Focus on Before, During, After - Before they chose you, what were their reasons for hesitation, after they got started were there areas of confusion that you need to address or change and help new clients be aware of, when complete what did they expect to happen next. There's gold in the questions and answers you hear over and over again.

• Be the news: Set up your RSS feeds or alerts to get the specific type of news that you report out on sent directly to you. Pay attention to what's happening in your area of expertise in the news and many times you'll find something that ties in perfectly to your audience's interests. For example, if your target market is counseling teens, stories that describe successful teens or stories that warn of various online dangers is a potential subject to share and comment on. If you have a coaching business for other business owners, sharing ways to get financing, tax breaks for business owners and other related topics will be appreciated. Even if that is not your main focus - sharing related tips is great.

• Give Product Reviews: When you come across tools or other products that help you. Share it. People always appreciate someone else's research and honest product reviews. Include who is best suited to use the tool or product and the features and benefits you experienced. If there were things you didn't like or thought it should have provided, include that too. Integrity is key.

• Share Case studies about Your Clients / Customers: Case studies are an excellent way to provide highly-informative success stories and they become amazing testimonials for your business.

• Interview other Experts / Celebrities in your Market: Your local celebrities and you interviewing or being interviewed by the experts in your field shows that you know the right people and you know them well. Implied in the celebrity factor is that you must be a celebrity or close to it if you are connected to other celebrities. This is the beginnings of a great PR campaign for online and offline PR.

• Have Someone Interview You: This is an excellent way to create content using the audio and transcript of your interview. Create great social media buzz by having your own followers submit questions for the interview.

• Have fun: A top reason face book has replaced the porn sites as most viewed site and why You Tube is about to take over Face book is that people are BORED. They seek information but also entertainment. You don't always have to come up with earth-shattering information to impress your audience. Have fun, inspire them or make them laugh. Share your personal side (not too personal mind youJ)

Feeling inspired? Great! Write down your new ideas now. In fact setup a list and put it in your smart phone, then add more. Sometimes a little story about what happened to you at a restaurant or at your kid's soccer game can become a relevant lesson to your readers.

How many times have you found yourself looking at your website statistics and noticed that 90% + of your visitors were brand new? You may have looked at that statistic and found yourself getting excited that so many new people were finding you each month.

Well I am not trying to make you feel bad but...

That's not a good thing. What it should be telling you is that visitors are arriving to your site, possibly clicking into it a bit, and not finding anything memorable enough to make them want to return. Hang on a second ... I am not slamming your current site or trying to make you feel as if your company is the only company in this position. It's actually quite normal. It doesn't have to be though.

Think about the sites you frequent the most. Heck, let's look beyond you and take a look at the top ten websites on a global level and see what all these sites have in common. The following is a list of the top ten global websites based on the amount of traffic they receive. I am proud to report that there is not one single porn site on this list. Looks like the Internet is beginning to mature.

1. Google

2. Yahoo

3. You Tube

4. Live

5. FaceBook

6. MSN

7. Wikipedia

8. Blogger

9. MySpace

10. Yahoo.co.jp (Yahoo Japan)

Alright, now that you know what the top ten sites are, what do they all have in common? Well I am sure you can see each of these sites ENGAGE their visitors. Whether they provide the ability for the visitors to search for an answer to that elusive question they've been seeking the answer to, or whether they provide the ability for them to socialize with people they graduated with over 20 years ago and have completely lost touch, or giving them the ability to learn how to tie a tie on a video that someone from half way around the globe posted to You Tube.

You may be saying, "Well that's great for those websites since their entire purpose of their existence is to provide these options to their visitors. That simply wouldn't work for my site." Well, I am here to tell you that is NOT correct. The people who are visiting your site are doing so because they have an interest in the products, services, or the cause you are promoting online. With web 2.0 you are provided several options to easily create pieces of functionality that will allow you to make a connection with your visitors and provide them with the ability to tell you what is important to them.

You could add a blog to your site to keep your visitors up to date on new developments within your industry or examples of how your product was used in unique ways to help another company experience significant growth. You could add a discussion forum so your visitors could get their questions answered or review the answer to a question that was asked by someone else. You could have "how to" videos on your website that help your visitor figure out how to accomplish that task that's been driving them crazy for the last month.

The bottom line is if you put yourself in the shoes of your potential visitor, and create mechanisms on your site that engage your visitors once they arrive, you will give them a reason to return to your site time and time again. If you take the time to do this you'll see that "new visitor" percentage drop, and your actual visitor number will begin to rise because you'll be adding return clients every single month. I promise you if you add these mechanisms and focus on providing compelling information for your visitors you can double your traffic in no time.

Penis pumps. Just type the words into any search engine and you will be swamped with results. There are plenty of how tos, reviews and even a double handful of self help videos all telling, or showing, you the knowledge seeker, exactly how to use vacuum pumping of the genitals to gain the desired enlargement in both length and thickness.But how often do you see a how NOT to article? Is there a demand for this type of knowledge? Take it from this poor, self abused unfortunate. Had I known the pitfalls before I made my purchase, I would have saved myself a little money and a LOT of embarrassment. Tho to be fair to the manufacturer of the model I bought, it was indeed very well made.

The day started out much the same as any day for two mature, bored and sexually active adults in a relationship. With a trip to a nearby cities rather large and well stocked adult novelty and porn emporium! Exciting to say the least. We wandered the aisles, excitement building as we unearthed more and more treasures. It wasn't long before I found myself standing before a veritable WALL of penis pumps. I really mean a wall. There were so many different styles and makes that the store had set aside an entire wall for their impressive collection. I worked my way through the smorgasbord of penile pumping devices, finally selecting and paying for my choice. A sleek and simple product made of high tensile space age plastic. Please remember the words space age plastic as they will come to mind later. My partner was unaware as she was in vibrator heaven 2 aisles over so I figured I would surprise her later with a bigger, larger, new improved me.

We went to lunch then returned home. I set aside my purchase while I went about the rest of my day doing whatever needed doing until I found myself with some idle time on my hands. What a perfect chance to improve myself! I quickly unpacked the pump and took a moment to admire the simplistic beauty of the device. A long, clear cylindrical tube with a rubber seal at the large open end and a clear tube running from a nipple at the far end to a hand held pump that closely resembled a bicycle pump in reverse. Placed about midway on the cylinder wall was a small hole. Included with this miracle of modern pumping technology was a rather small and silly looking pamphlet claiming to be the instructions. Instructions? For something as easy as this? We don't need no stinking instructions! I tossed the instructions carelessly over my shoulder as I disrobed and prepared to pump.

Now, let me backtrack a second here. I make a living working construction trades. Some years ago I was unfortunate enough to have an accident that cost me the thumb and index finger on my left hand (Still a carpenter so go figure). I tell you this now so you may understand what came next and why this doesn't really apply to most NORMAL people. By normal I mean those in possession of a brain. I slipped the end of the device over my organ then started pumping. Air just whistled through the cylinder. Aha! The hole! Hmm, what to do? Houston, we have a problem. Being as I am digitally challenged I quickly realized I did NOT possess the fingers needed to block the air hole thus enabling the device to pump correctly. Also, I had noticed the rubber seal did not seal as well as it should. That must be what the small tube of lube was for! I generously lubricated the seal, slipped the device back over my organ and slapped a piece of scotch tape over the hole. Now we were in business! I took a few practice pumps and was happy to see and feel an immediate response. So I pumped about 20 times more. WOW did I get big! It looked like it had been slammed in a door, so angry and swollen. Impressive to say the least!

Just as I was starting to enjoy the new me it suddenly dawned on me that I MAY have over pumped just a tad. It started to turn dark purple. It started to HURT. It started to THROB. I quickly reached for the end tab of the scotch tape I had applied and snatched it from the cylinder. To my unspeakable horror I was left looking at a piece of tape dangling from my fingers with a perfect hole in it! The hole was still sealed and now was impossible to get the edge of it started so I could get it off. I calmly told myself no big deal. This is when I realized I MAY have over lubed as my right testicle was SUCKED up into the tube with my already squished organ. Calm just went out the window. It was at about this time that I discovered just how tough space age plastic really is as I began beating the cylinder against the corner of the dresser in an attempt to shatter it. I had a better chance at winning the lottery. The noise from all this must have alerted my diminutive wife, so she came to see what all the noise and screaming was about. She entered the bedroom to find me naked, on all fours, scrambling around frantically searching for the instruction pamphlet while dangling a penis pump that contained what NOW looked like a bloated kielbasa gone bad. She sat on the edge of the bed and LAUGHED until she cried. I was NOT amused. When I finally gritted out a smart remark about how she COULD make herself useful, she responded by walking over to my pants, getting my pocketknife from the pocket and using it to puncture the tape covering the safety hole. She was still laughing as I threw the possessed device across the room and sat there nursing my very swollen genitals.

If you have ever seen a car tire about to blow, when it gets that little lump in the sidewall, this is how my penis looked. Luckily for me the damage wasn't permanent and the blowout lump was gone 2 days later. Still, this was enough to put me off penis pumps permanently. When I called the store and asked if there had been any documented problems with pumps, I was told not with MY model. It appears they make even MORE powerful pumps than the one I chose. I guess lady luck was just with me that day, otherwise my butt might have been sucking up the bedspread.